Week 6: Relationships: Supporters and Saboteurs
Please note: This week there is a "Keeping It Real" message for you to play at the end of the meeting. Also, you’ll be reminding people that this is an order week. So, plan to allow at least 5 -8 minutes time at the end of the meeting.
Past week review (no longer than 10 - 15 minutes).
Last week's lesson was about assertiveness and gave you some tips on how to become more assertive. Did hearing this lesson affect you in any of your interactions this past week?
What did you do? Did you handle things differently than you might have in the past? Or, if you didn't, thinking more about the value of assertiveness, what would you like to do differently the next time this happens? Please give a real life example.
Discuss – and since assertiveness is such an important topic – be sure that several group members give examples.
Now, before we go on to the lesson, does anyone have any other insights or interesting experiences that they think would be valuable to share with the group? What about any questions?
Wait for any response/discussion. (Be sure not to let this run too long or get too far off topic.)
Then, play the lesson. (Next Slide )
After Audio Check-In:
What did you think of the lesson you just heard? Anyone have any thoughts they'd like to share? Questions? "Ah Ha Moments"?
Give people a bit of time to flush out initial reactions before moving on to the next discussion point. If there are no responses, simply move forward.
Discussion Point 1:
How have your family and friends responded to your being on this program? Take a few minutes to think about it. Can you identify who are your supporters and who are your saboteurs?
Who can start us off by naming someone who they now realize falls into the category of a supporter or a saboteur? You don't need to give an actual name, just identify their general relationship with you…such as family member, friend, co-worker.
Talk about what they do that makes them your supporter…or what makes them a saboteur.
Discuss. Call on people if no one volunteers.
Discussion Point 2:
Transactional Analysis tells us that there are three ego states: Parent, Adult and Child. What do you think is your ego state when dealing with your saboteur? What is theirs? Who would like to start?
Call on people who responded to the previous question. Wait for the discussion to slow and then go to the next discussion point.
Discussion Point 3:
Now, very important, have you begun using your new-found assertiveness tools to deal with your saboteur? What have you done? Or, if you haven't yet, what will you do? You can ask the group for suggestions on ways to use assertiveness to help you in dealing with this person.
You can start with the first person who spoke previously.
Discussion Point 4:
A new tool was added to your toolbox this week: "The 5 Why's." To help us see how the "5 Why's" works, we're going to practice asking each other the why questions behind our own eating urges.
So, please think back to the review you did just before this meeting of the Urge Journal entries you made last week. Think about an entry when you wanted to eat when it wasn't time for a shake or meal. Please share the situation from your entry and then we'll ask you "Why" 5 times to help you dig deeper. Who'll start us out?
By being willing to really dig deeper into issues, you can begin to make some breakthroughs that will help you create new patterns in your life. Start using "The 5 Why's" – it’s a powerful tool for change.
Remember, this is an order week! It's important that you place your order for the next Program Segment – that is, for weeks 9 -12 – right away. It's best to do it right after this meeting. If you can't do it immediately, be sure to get your order in within 3 days from right now to ensure you get your shakes on time.
And because this is an order week, which means that you’ll be committing to continuing on in the program, there is a short “Keeping It Real” message for you to listen to this week.
Go to Next Slide for "Keeping it Real" Audio Message. (Use the "screen share" option like you do with lessons)
Keeping It Real
After playing the message, end the meeting by reading the following:
Think about it – have you been doing everything that you committed to do at the beginning of the program? And this means everything…even not bothering to record your weight and total inches lost counts! If you have been giving yourself reasons or excuses for not fully participating in all aspects of the program, please recognize this as the Resistance that it is! And now – right at this point where you will be paying for the next segment of the program – now is the perfect time to re-commit. Be smart -- don’t cheat yourself!